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The Roles You Play

Take a look at the roles you play on the stage of life.

A role is a set of behaviors that you act out during certain situations.

Imagine your life unfolds on a theater stage as if it's a play and you're acting out a character or role.

Your character may be the role of a parent, a child, a friend, a spouse, an employee, a manager, a teacher, a banker or lawyer or all of the above.

Your character may play other roles that are more like parts of your identity or lifestyle, such as being a helper or a leader or maybe even a hero.

The roles you play are not who you are.

They are simply an aspect of what you do in your life, acted out according to a script that you follow, based on how you've been conditioned to believe of how this role is supposed to be played.

You've probably heard of the term, role model and these role models are the people from which you learn how these roles are supposed to be played.

These roles we play and our beliefs about how they're supposed to be acted out can have a dramatic impact on our lives.

For example, couples who lived together for years and then decide to get married, often find that the relationship changes once they're officially married,

So you might be wondering, well, after so long, why would it change.

Well, it's because we each have a definition for the role of a boyfriend or girlfriend versus the role of a husband or wife.

Within our minds, we have expectations of how each of these roles is supposed to be played. And we apply those expectations to ourselves and onto our partners.

if we change the definition of a role, the relationship will change.

And so, even if people have been together for a really long time and it was working great, once they are in this new role of husband and wife, their expectations shift, because of their beliefs they hold about marriage, without realizing it.

As the beliefs shift from role to role, problems can pop up which did not exist before.

In the famous Zimbardo prison experiment, he took college students and put them in a makeshift prison at the college,

and he randomly assigned roles to each student as either a guard or a prisoner.

The experiment was supposed to last for two weeks, but it ended up lasting for only five days.


Each participant quickly fully embodied the role that they were given and they completely forgot that they were only part of an experiment.

So what happened was, the guards started treating the students who played the roles of prisoners as actual prisoners and even became abusive towards these students.

It was successfully demonstrated through this study that people change very quickly to fit a role that they believe is their role to play.

And how sad when people give a child an identity, such as you're a bad kid, because they're being told their role is to be bad, and so they fulfill it.

So, Whether you realize it or not, you are driven by your roles that you have defined.

And unless you become aware of them, you're likely to continue to act them out even if they don't serve you.

People that have developed a role of being the victim will always find ways and experiences that are going to reinforce that belief.

People that have taken on the role of being everyone's savior are constantly ending up surrounding themselves with people that need to be rescued.

Understanding your role is crucial because it gives you a choice to decide if the role that you're playing is one that truly benefits you.

And once you identify what roles you play and how you play them and where you have learned to play the role, you can then rethink and write your roles.

You can choose to change the roles that you play as well as how you act out each of these roles in order to live more authentically as your true self and more aligned with

your purpose.

So, what roles or characters do you play on the stage of your life.

In your family, relationships, in your community, in your career?

What are the rules that you play by?

What identity or lifestyle roles do you have.

Who were your role models?

Your parents, relatives, teachers, community members, TV characters ?

Are you playing any roles that you don't want to be playing.?

Or does the way that you're playing them just feel like it's not really you.

How would these roles need to change for you in order to feel like you're living in alignment with your true self?

And do you have any rules in your life that you play now that you need to eliminate?

What benefit do you get from maintaining them?

What benefit would you get from removing them or changing them?

Who would you be if the roles that you don't want to be playing just disappear tomorrow?

Who would your character be if you were the real you, the authentic you, not just playing a role?

It’s time you reflect on the roles what you play, where they came from what changes you would need to make in order to be living your life, not as a set of roles that you're playing, but as you.

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